After using a public toilet, I am owed compensation for the sanitisation of my soul. The actual state of public toilets is a crime in and of itself. I absolutely despise using public toilets, I feel so unclean after using them. The general experience of using a public toilet itself is unpleasant. There is never enough
toilet paper, it is either 1ply, not there at all or like sandpaper.
When you step into a public toilet, you may be greeted by graffiti from the ones who were there before you. The toilet ancestors. A visual reminder you weren’t the first here, and certainly not the last. The artwork itself usually consists of swear words or other inappropriate drawings. It's not Picasso, but it
is something to look at.
The bathroom stalls are not spacious enough, and sometimes there is no peg on the door, so you must hold up your bag and pray it doesn’t touch God knows what that is on the floor. Never assume that the mystery liquid on the floor is water.
If you sit down you must factor in the lid of the toilet itself is usually broken, and you are guaranteed to get a shock when you sit down. Flushing the toilet feels like a horror movie jump scare, mocking you with its loud flush.
The horrors don’t end there. I’ll walk out of the toilet feeling part of my soul has been flushed away, part of my soul tarnished. I hope that this soap can cleanse my soul after the horrors, oh wait. There is no soap. I can’t sing Happy Birthday to this, this is ridiculous.
After washing my hands, or in other words, putting them under the cold tap, it is time to dry them. The hand dryer is either broken or it is screaming like a banshee when you dry them. Or a third option, such a weak jet of air you might as well shake your hands about and dry them that way. Maybe use that lovely one-ply toilet paper, if it's even there, and dry them with that.
I don’t think anyone enjoys using a public toilet. I definitely don’t. You only use them if you are desperate. Public toilets need to be better. I hate having this kind of experience every time I use them.